When the Broken Walk in

Two years ago a mother walked into our church holding her baby called Lexi. Her baby had cancer and she had run out of options. Could we try praying? I remember this mum standing up the front asking Jesus to help her and our Elders calling us to pray. Cancer go away. Be healed.

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, ESV)

Pray without ceasing. Two years went by. During this time of praying Lexi’s mum met Jesus. He turned her life upside down. You can see the difference. You can see the joy.

This mum first walked in clutching her baby with cancer and seeming to have no hope at all. Then she met Jesus and she changed from no hope to having every hope and expectancy.

The father of Lexi saw a change. Lexi’s mum was different. The hope and new life she has is infectious. The change is life changing and people notice. Lexi’s father met Jesus and Jesus changed him too. Welcome to the family.

This is almost like the story of the paralysed man. People bringing him in from the roof in desperation and Jesus saying “your sins are forgiven”… they and you cry – “But you missed the point Jesus, he wants to walk!”

But Jesus says – “Which is easier, to say to the paralytic, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Rise, take up your bed and walk’? (Mark 2v9)

Jesus says – which is more important? Healing of our body or of our heart? Jesus cleanses the heart through his blood and gives eternal life.

Jesus did that with Lexi’s mum and dad. He said to them – “Your sins are forgiven”. This is a beautiful miracle in itself. We rejoice in this!

The story could end here. It does for many people and there is still reason to rejoice at this point. Even though its painful. There can be an element of yearning and sorrow in our rejoicing. “Though I walk through the wilderness. Blessed Be Your name”

But the story doesn’t stop there. Not today.

We got told on Sunday that another miracle has happened. Lexi has been healed. At this point she hadn’t had any treatment however the cancer had gone. It is impossible. No more cancer. No more tumors. No more. Gone. Miracle.

The faith of the church was raised on that Sunday. My faith has risen too. Not because of the sign itself but because of who the sign points to. Jesus.

Thank you Jesus.

It is good to be church. It’s good to be a part of this family where broken, hopeless people are welcomed, they meet Jesus and their lives change. It’s good to cry together and rejoice together. The roof was raised on Sunday. Together we prayed, together we praised, together we felt a part of this. Faith was raised together in church.

Thank you Jesus for the church. Thank you for Lexi and her mum and dad. Thank you that you do heal, but more so thank you that you save.

“I say to you, rise, pick up your bed, and go home.” And he rose and immediately picked up his bed and went out before them all, so that they were all amazed and glorified God, saying, “We never saw anything like this!” (Mark 2v11-12)

M.E. Awareness Week

I didn’t know if I should write this. It feels really sensitive and it is. But I want to write this so that those who read this will learn more about M.E. I want to write this because I want to learn more.

It is M.E. awareness week.

I remember when I was in school there was a girl in our class who had M.E. She would be off school a lot. I didn’t really understand what it was or what it meant. Everyone just knew that she was really tired all the time. I didn’t know it was something way more than that.

Not until I met and befriended a lovely lady called Tanya who has M.E.

The media isn’t very helpful when it comes to M.E. They seem to only portray it as a psychological problem. There are reports that suggest M.E is all in the mind. It’s like they are saying – You are making this up or You just need to think happy thoughts. You just need to get out of this rut.

It seems like the doctors don’t really know what to do and it doesn’t seem like there is any extensive research going into this.

I find this odd. I wonder if these people who write articles in the newspaper have ever had experience with M.E. Have they ever been friends with someone with M.E? I fear the answer is probably no and they see these people as statistics rather than friends, family or partners. Perhaps as you read this you are inclined to believe those papers without ever actually meeting someone with M.E.

The reason I write this is because when I read Tanya’s blog post about M.E. it reminded me that I have a lot to learn and that what the media says isn’t always reality.

Becoming better friends with Tanya has been great and we enjoy our chats in the afternoon with good coffee. Through this friendship one of things that she has helped me understand is the affects of M.E. And as you read this I wanted to tell you that her M.E. isn’t made up or all in her head. And neither are her friends making up their M.E.

When you get to know someone and you chat and you share worries and dreams and you pray together you begin to see their heart. You begin to see that M.E. is terrible and very real. This isn’t something you would make up – it’s not something you would want to make up or lie about. It is real and it is a thief that robs time and energy away from my friend.

I don’t want to make a case study of Tanya. But I want to show you that it is better to look into, to understand, to meet people and to research and ask questions before believing what the newspapers or the hype says about it.

The truth is I don’t always know what to say. I try to ask as many questions as I can to learn more. I want to learn and understand more. I want to pray and pray for healing too. I don’t know what its like to have M.E. But I want to say I believe you and not in a patronising way, but in a way that says I want to understand more and ask how can I help?

So then, if you feel the same and want to know more, here are some places you can go which may help and has helped me:

Tanya’s blog post on M.E awareness week

Tanya’s post on why you should care about M.E.

Action for M.E

Jenny’s blog

Serving without Sinking

Have you ever had that moment where you are just really fed up of serving? At first it was a joy but now it’s just boring and repetitive. It feels like you are the only one who is serving while everyone else has gone home. And no one praises you or encourages you. Day in and day out it you slog away and you’re tired. You’re tired of it all.

Does that sound familiar? If it does, can I recommend a book to you? I know, another book to read – but it has been one of the most helpful books I’ve read on serving.

Serving without Sinking – by John Hindley is a book that is Christ focused. In fact you spend over half the book looking at Jesus and how He serves you. This really makes you examine your heart and the motives of your heart towards serving. You could be like the person I described above where you are just fed up of serving and you feel very discouraged and tired of it all. Then this book will remind you how Christ serves you first and how he delights in you. It will melt your heart to see the love that Christ has for you. With this in mind it changes the way you think about serving from a “I should do” or a “I have to” turned to a “I want to” and “I delight to” Why? because every bit of service – making tea, printing music, washing tables, welcome team is all serving Jesus and we can do that because he first and foremost serves us.

Or perhaps you are someone who isn’t like the person above – maybe you only serve to get recognition or you just can’t be bothered to serve others. John Hindley reminds us what kind of master we have – He is good and kind and he calls us to serve him. Again he calls us to this only after he has first served us. He is a serving master who loves his servants, servants who are sons and daughters of his Father. He calls us to serve with a glad heart – looking to Christ and not for recognition from others. We can do this because we have the Lord who knows us and a Father who sees what we do in secret.

I found this book to be good news for my heart. It’s a short book but with a deep focus on Jesus. I feel like it is something we all need at the moment.

You can get the book at the Good Book Company.

Ali Bolton has read and reviewed the book here.

Introverts at a Conference

Something I learnt when I became a Christian was that Christians like to go away into the middle of nowhere, spend most hours of the day with people who they may or may not know, sit in meetings together, sing songs together and share rooms together and all this fueled by coffee and cake with not a bit of vitamin C in sight. It seems a bit odd at first glance.

However from my experience conferences are fun and exciting. Especially when you get to hang out with your friends, hear brilliant teaching and share in fellowship with brothers and sisters all around the world.

But for the introvert, conferences can cause a slight flutter of nerves and sweaty palms. The idea of spending a week or more surrounded by people for most the day or sitting in large meetings can be overwhelming. And I often feel like that.

Part of my job is to go to a lot of conferences. So I had to find a way to cope with them so that I wouldn’t shrivel up inside and retreat to my “happy place” every time I am in a social situation where I have to talk “small talk”. So here is my personal mini-guide on how an introvert can survive a conference:

1. Pray – I get quite anxious before a conference and I try to think up 100 diseases I could catch so that I would have a good excuse not to go. So I have to cling on to the verse that I need to cast all my anxieties on to him because he cares for me (1 Peter 5:7). The Lord does care for me and he doesn’t want me to worry about this conference, so a good pray and then several thousand repeated prayers because I am dull of heart, tends to help.

2. Don’t Expect to Speak to Everyone – Having conversations with everyone will tire you out, so don’t place those expectations on yourself. You will have someone on stage saying that you need to make sure you are sociable and speak to everyone. But that may look different for you – you don’t have to be a social butterfly, going from one conversation to another with a flap of your wings. You may find you have a couple of close friends you stick to throughout the week and then a couple of others outside your friendship group that you invest in from time to time. And that is OK. Those relationships will be more meaningful. I have found that through this approach I have deepened a lot of my friendships at work.

3. Take Time Out – Rest. Don’t go to everything. If you need time out and it means missing a talk or going to bed early, than do it. And don’t feel guilty about it. At a conference I sometimes feel like I am back at school with my pleated skirt and oversized blazer and I have to go to every lesson for the fear of being told off. A conference is not school. We are now adults. We don’t have to go to everything. We can choose what we go to. And praise the Lord I don’t have to wear that blazer anymore!

4. Rejoice in our Extroverted Friends – Praise the Lord for our extroverted friends. You see them going from one person to another, creating connections, being influential having streams of conversations. Praise the Lord that they are different to you. Don’t be jealous. They are just different to you and you are making connections in different ways to them.

5. Rest Afterwards – Thankfully I get time off in lieu for being at a conference. After a conference I often feel exhausted and drained so if you can rest afterwards then do! Don’t feel guilty having time out and away from people after a conference.

6. Go out of your Comfort Place – Being an introvert is not excuse to hide away for all of the conference and not speak to anyone! It’s not an excuse to not make any connections with people or make an effort. We need to push out of our comfort zone – meet new people, make conversation even if its hard, create connections and be interested in people. Chances are you will meet people from all different walks of life, with various struggles, cultures and ideas. They are exciting to get to know.

So there you go, a small list of how I survive a conference as an introvert. Please do add any of your own advice in my comments as I am always interested to learn in this area.

Black Mirror: Be Right Back

  When you lose a loved one it feels like you are slung into an empty pit. A pit of darkness and numbness, with high walls and thin air. It is horrible and you would do anything to have them back. In the episode “Be right back” from Black Mirror it explores the idea of bringing back a loved one. Not like in some strange zombie way. At first its in a way that would ease pain and then it becomes strange.

Martha loses her husband which is devastating and as a method of coping her friend signs her up to the latest technology where a computer program can glean information about your loved one so that you can talk to them. They gather that information from facebook, twitter and e-mails. The more activity online the better. Martha can then start to chat with her dead husband (Ash) through this program. This program simulates Ash in a convincing way and Martha spends hours talking to him, spends hours on the internet and then on the phone as the program updates and it can sound exactly like Ash. It sounds strangely comforting. Imagine being able to talk to your loved one again? Being able to hear their voice one last time. Being able to say I love you. It’s a very human response.

But there is a next step. Black Mirror takes us further. What if you could actually see your loved one? Where they physically returned to you as a very realistic robot (think less terminator and more AI or the Bionic Man). They would look like your loved one, same hair, eyes and skin colour. They would sound like your loved one. At any glance you would think it was them. It seems like a truly remarkable resurrection.

But a few hitches were encountered. Ash wasn’t really Ash. Ash was a computer program pretending to be Ash. Acting very much like him, but not really him. She hates how empty he is and she yearns for the real Ash. She cries:

““No, but you’re not you, are you? You’re just a few ripples of you. There’s no history to you. You’re just a performance of stuff that he performed without thinking and it’s not enough.”

I think Charlie Brooker is confronting our addiction to social media and our tendency to become so absorbed in it that it shows a few ripples of you, but it isn’t actually you. When thinking about this show my thought turned to fullness of life and real resurrection. Martha showed a great yearning – a yearning for Ash when he was alive and buried in his phone on facebook and then a yearning for Ash when he died and she was faced with a hollow resurrection.

I mentioned in my previous post on fullness of life in the Reality of Escapism. A virtual world that numbs us. In this episode Be Right Back, there is a desire for fullness of resurrection. We want our loved ones back. We want them back not in shell or on a facebook page. We want the fully flesh and fully human loved one back.

When Jesus rose from the dead, he didn’t come back zombie like or ghost like. He came back physically, with wholeness, eating and walking. He came back as a demonstration of the new creation. Resurrection is no empty shell. You will be fully alive, eating, drinking and wonderfully real as you can get with no sin or shame attached. Resurrection is beautiful. Martha was right to yearn for it. It’s a desire in us. We have eternity set in our hearts.

It’s good to yearn for life after death. But real resurrection and life can’t come through an android,  iphone or facebook. Thats not where to live or be raised to life from. Resurrection and life come only through the resurrection of Jesus. I’d like to say that this is an easy thing. But to get to resurrection there must be death. To get to the fullness of life there can be pain and suffering. The sting of death has been defeated – its claws and chains are gone. But there is still a wave of hurt and pain that comes over us when death knocks on the door. When that happens whats should we do? When looking for comfort where should we go? Not to social networking, but to Jesus. Come to Jesus who has been raised to life. He is the fullness of Resurrection and you will find all comfort in him. There is some solace in social networking, friendships and bonds that can help. But first come to Jesus – seek life in Him.

15 Million Merits: Reality of Escapism

15 Million Merits is based in a world where exercise bikes power the world and those who are on those bikes earn merits (money) so that they can buy food and accessories for their “doppel” (which is a virtual version of you and you can dress them up etc), their bedroom are made up of screens where they have to watch adverts including adverts of porn and a game show called Hot Shots (a take from X Factor). It’s a world where reality is based on a screen, your life has adverts streaming to you where ever you are and there is a charge for not watching them. Those who don’t contribute to society due to being overweight, ill or old get ridiculed and some become cleaners where the bike riders hail abuse at them.

The only way out, the only salvation is by auditioning for Hot Shots so that you can win freedom. But all is not as it seems, the protagonist Bing meets a lady who actually has talent and a shot of getting out of this mundane bike riding life. But it’s all a fake, the judges don’t care for her or her talent and instead persuade her to go on the porn channel and be a porn star where she can become famous and never have to ride a bike again. This infuriates Bing and so he fights back and comes out with heart wrenching speech in front of the judges where he hits the nail on the head of how the world of the Doppel, the world of technology has numbed our minds:

“What, I have a dream? The peak of our dreams is a new app for our Dopple, it doesn’t exist! It’s not even there! We buy sh*t that’s not even there. Show us something real and free and beautiful. You couldn’t. Yeah? It’ll break us. We’re too numb for it. I might as well choke. It’s only so much wonder we can bear. That’s why when you find any wonder whatsoever; you dole it out in meager portions.”

“The peak of our dream is a new app” It’s disturbing isn’t it? Bing goes on to say:

“And only then until it’s augmented, packaged, and plumped through 10,000 pre-assigned filters till it’s nothing more than a meaningless series of lights, while we ride day in day out, going where? Powering what? All tiny cells and tiny screens and bigger cells and bigger screens”

“It doesn’t exist”… “while we ride day in day out, going where? Powering what?” A mundane existence that drives towards getting bigger cells (living spaces) and bigger screens (ipads, flat screen TV’s). We power on and on and we become numb and anything real or beautiful will just break us. Some of this is Ecclesiastes language, the idea of meaningless and striving and toiling and not getting anywhere. It makes you take a step back. Am I numb to life? Do I just want comfort? Is the constant viewing of screens and online life sapping something of beauty and wonder away?

“But I don’t want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want sin.”
― Aldous Huxley, Brave New World

In Huxley’s Brave New World he also explores the place of technology and pleasure. Technology appears to be the saviour of mankind where they can find all their comforts and needs met while reducing danger and pain – but at the cost of mind-numbing dependence. Huxley gives us a grim view of the future on the same vein as 15 Million Merits.

Technology isn’t evil. But it makes you think about what you value and where the world is heading. Sometimes I find myself in a group of people and all I am doing is checking my phone looking at twitter and Facebook. In these moments I am missing the interaction and community around me.

In 15 Million Merits there is an escape from the mundane way of life through the Doppel and through the Reality TV show “Hot Shots”. Both which prove to be fake, they trap you in a world that drugs you and deprives you of real beauty and emotion.

This show makes you yearn for real life. The gritty real life of flesh, dirt and sweat. The place of real conversations and emotions. There is a moment when Bing and this lady hold hands. It’s the one thing thats real.

It makes me think about how Jesus takes on real flesh and becomes truly human. Truly human means he laughs and cries and hugs people and eats with people and gets tired. Truly human means having a perfect relationship with His Father in Heaven. He says he has come to bring life and life to its fullness. Fullness of touch, taste and sounds. Broken relationships restored.

We not only have the physical and spiritual but we now have the virtual.

Imagination is good. It’s needed for creativity. Escapism on some level that transforms us into a world of imagination and stretches our mind with stories is good. They draw us out of ourselves. But when our world is seen through a screen, eyes fixed on a black mirror, distracted by the beeping and adverts then life becomes very small, we are drawn into ourselves.

Is Facebook real life? In some sense yes, there is a reality to it, there is a community on some level. There is a function to it and its a good function. But also in some sense it’s not real life, it’s not where I should live my life or spend my money, it’s not where I solely cultivate community. Flesh is better. Face to face is better. A life less in front of a screen is fuller. Jesus offers us more. He offers us the gritty life of new creation and new family where we are invited to live in community like in Acts 2:42-47. He offers us true humanity in Him. If we want to escape the mundane and meaningless parts of our lives then we should turn to Him. Not a computer screen.

“I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10

At the end of 15 Million Merits, Bing is offered an escape where he can have his own 30 min show twice a week where he says soul-stirring speeches like the one above. But as the camera pans out we see that Bing has been sucked into the lie. In his room, which is much bigger then before, he stares out the window overlooking a beautiful forest. But its fake. It’s another computer screen. It’s not reality. He doesn’t have fullness of life. There is only one way to get that.

The Spirit of Sonship

The apostle Paul in the letter to the Galatians bangs the same drum. He bangs it over and over again. And it’s a worthy drum to do so. The drum is the Gospel. The drum is the good news of Jesus Christ.

The Galatians are being wooed by other lovers and they are being tempted to move away from Christ, they are being tempted that rules and law are appealing. It’s not that they are just not hitting the right points on the theology counter – Its more than  just misunderstanding what the Gospel means. In fact its far worse, Paul says that:

“I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting him who called you in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel”
(Galatians 1:6 ESV)

They have misunderstood who the Father is. The Galatians are deserting the Father by not trusting in His son. They are moving away from their first love, they believe that the blood of Christ isn’t enough for them and that they need to add to what Christ has done. They don’t understand how much the Father loves them and they have forgotten their true identity.

In Galatians 4 Paul gives a wonderful illustrations to woo them back to Christ. The illustration is that of the Trinity. He reminds them that their identity is wrapped up in who God is and God is a Tri-Unity, a loving relationship of 3 persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. He shows how the Father sends his Son, who dies and redeems and wins us back. Through Jesus we are adopted and the Father sends his Spirit into our hearts and he cries “Abba Father” on our behalf. So that the Father looks at us he sees his son and when the father turns his ear to us he hears his son crying out to him. Adopted. We are his sons, we are heirs to the promise.

No wonder Paul calls it foolish to think that we can add anything to this. To think that our efforts and rules could add to this adoption is rather missing the point. Paul links this up and reminds them that if they were to move away from this good news and try to add to it then they are just going to enslave themselves. They are going to go back to slavery – they are going to act like a child of the slave woman Hagar instead of acting like who they truly are which is a child of the free woman Sarah.

We often feel like we know this. We hear it so often that it becomes old news rather than good news. But lets remind our hearts again.

To be adopted by the Father through his Son Jesus is the most wonderful, astounding and beautiful news we can ever have. To think that we would enslave ourselves to rules and laws or to think that we can protect our hearts from sin by rules and laws would be utter foolishness. Instead Paul draws us out from that way of thinking and he draws our gaze back to Christ.

Come and look at Him. Come and gaze on his beauty. You can do this because you are free, because you are adopted and no longer a slave to rules or sin. Christ has set you free. So then call upon your Father in Heaven, call upon him for all your needs. Don’t look within you nor build up a protection of rules around you because when you break those rules you will feel guilty and the lies will seep in that will say “The Father is disappointed in you” or “The Father doesn’t love you”… lies lies lies.

If you feel like that, if you feel like a failure, if you feel like your sinning again and again, if you feel weak and you feel burdened under the weight of rules and expectations than I say to you: Come to the Father. Come to Him and find your comfort. Come and gaze at His Son, come and find refuge in Him. You have the Spirit of Sonship dwelling in you and you are free… so come and enjoy your heavenly Father who loves you very much. To end, Spurgeon says:

“Go home, my Brothers and Sisters, and live in the spirit of sonship! Wake up in the morning and let your first thought be, “My Father, my Father, be with me this day.” Go out into business (lectures) and when things perplex you (things are hard), let this be your resort—“My Father, help me in this hour of need.” When you go to your home and meet with domestic anxieties, let your cry be, “Help me, my Father.”

When alone, you are not alone because the Father is with you! And in the midst of the crowd you are not in danger, because the Father, Himself, loves you! What a blessed word is that—“The Father Himself loves you”! Go and live as His children!”

Winning Hearts for Christ

I woke up this morning with a cold heart. Post mission week blues. I couldn’t bring myself to do much and so I put on some talks because a friend (Emily) said I should listen to this guy John Hindley. After listening to two of the talks I found my heart warmed again as he spoke about Christ. He not only reminded my of the love of Christ but that Christ is The Truth and sin is a result of not loving Jesus.

So if you are feeling weary, cold, distant and rubbish. Come and listen to these talks. Just listen and allow your heart to be won to Christ again.

Winning hearts to Christ Part 1a and 1b

Part 2 – The truth is a person

Part 3 – Preaching to the heart

Part 4 – Beauty wins the heart

Collection of Webs (26)

Here are some great blog posts on the internet at the moment:

Death to January – Blog post by Emma Scrivener: “A time of fresh starts, resolutions and beginnings.  But how do you make them, when you’re in the same body, with the same mind, the same relationships, the same job (or lack of), and same struggles? This month it’s harder to trot out the same excuses.”

Is the bible a book about God? – Written by Dan Hames: The Bible is specifically a book about the Son of God. So long as we say that the Bible is a book about ‘God’ in the abstract, and not fighting hard for the centrality of Christ to the Bible, we’re depriving him of his rightful place, and ourselves of vital spiritual sustenance.

Welcome to the Crazy Church Family – by Bryony Young: “I have come to the conclusion that my Church is simply a glorious ruin. Glorious because we aim to glorify God and a ruin because we are still a work in progress.”

Boots – by Tanya Marlow: “Most days I am actually okay about being ill; I kind of accept it and get on with life. It doesn’t feature much in my thinking. Today is not one of those days.”

Three is the Loveliest number – Article by Mike Reeves: “For the health of the church and our faith, we must be proud of who our God is. And since the Trinity is no mere theological icing resting atop our God—since the living God is Trinity—we must be resolutely and thoroughly Trinitarian in all our ways and thoughts.”

Books in 2012

Last year I wrote about the books I read in 2011. In 2012 I managed to read more books – 31 books in total. Which doesn’t feel like a lot at all, but it’s quite fun setting this little goal for me each year. Now armed with a kindle (thank you lovely husband) my hope is that I will read more books and more classic books at that! But let me share with you some of my favourite books of this year! Here they are in no particular order:

1. The Hunger Games Trilogy – I thought these books were a great adventure and I enjoyed the film. The second book wasn’t fantastic but I liked the fact the ending was different to how I expected it. This is a great book for those that like suspense!

 

2. Game of Thrones – I quite enjoyed this book and book 2 of this series (only 3 more to go!). It’s a good fantasy series, although slightly heavy going if you’re not normally into the fantasy genre. But I love the plot twists and the character developments in this story. Its got lots of fighting, romance, dragons and mystery! Brilliant

 

3. If God, Then What? – This book by Andrew Wilson was probably one of the best apologetic books I have read and a book I would gladly give to my non-Christian friends. Its thought-provoking, great at asking questions and leads you into a story that really makes you question what you think. Good stuff.

 

4. The Good God – This is a book about the Trinity written by Mike Reeves. Most books I read on the trinity can be quite off-putting and boring, but the Good God is one of the best books on the Trinity. It is heart warming, easy to read and it draws you in to see how our relational Triune God is Good news for all of us compared to a one person God. This is one to read for 2013!

 

5. A New Name – A wonderful and heart wrenching book written by Emma Scrivener. I have recommended this book to so many people. Emma shares her story and her battle with anorexia. Although this book is about anorexia and Emma’s life, it also speaks to the heart about the human problem and how our hearts run after idols. This is a challenging book.

 

 

6.The Hobbit – I read the Hobbit this year, mostly because the film has come out and I wanted to finally get round to reading it. I loved it, I forgot how much I enjoy reading Tolkien’s books. It’s a great fantasy adventure with all your favourite characters!

 

Well 2013 is upon us and I have a list of books brewing for me to read. But I am open for recommendations. What do you think I should read in 2013?